I don't know what to say...

I feel really bad right now. I don't know what to say. You know, I can understand right now if Sin Yi would never ever forgive me. I might not even forgive myself. I made her cry and I just wanna say a million times sorry right now. I guess He was right all along. The Lord did talk to me before I posted that terrible thing and He said, "Don't do it, child." I knew it but I still went along doing it. I don't deserve being called a Christian, do I? I call myself a Christian because I want to be one and I want to do what God wants me to do. But I'm not doing it, am I? I hurt people, I say bad things, I don't respect people, how am I ever gonna respect God!? The one thing I remember most about what the Bible said was that we should love God and love others like we love ourselves! I don't even do all those stuff! ARRRGGGGHHHH!!!!!!!! I don't know what to say now but SORRY TAN SIN YI! AND IT'S TO TAN SIN YI! NOT ERI-CHAN, NOT SIN-CHAN NOT ALL THOSE CRAP WE NAMED YOU! YOU ARE YOU AND TRUTHFULLY I SAY, I DO LOVE YOU! I LOVE LIKE A SISTER! I JUST DO THINGS WRONG SOMETIMES AND I HOPE I WOULD NEVER SEE U CRY EVER AGAIN COZ IT HURTS ME TO SEE YOU CRY!!! I WOULD BEG YOU TO FORGIVE ME IF I COULD, RIGHT NOW!!